Over the years officiating Punjabi and Sikh ceremonies across Sydney, one question comes up again and again — from couples, and just as often from guests of other backgrounds: why do so many Sikh women share the name Kaur? The answer is one of the most beautiful in the Sikh tradition, and it carries a meaning worth understanding before you stand up to marry.
The meaning of Kaur
Kaur translates to "princess." But it means more than royalty in the ornamental sense — it carries the idea of sovereignty, dignity and self-possession. To be a Kaur is to be a woman who stands in her own right, equal to anyone, answerable to no one for her worth.
Where the name comes from
In 1699, on the festival of Vaisakhi, the tenth Sikh Guru — Guru Gobind Singh Ji — founded the Khalsa, the community of initiated Sikhs. As part of that founding, he gave two shared names to all Sikhs: Singh ("lion") for men, and Kaur ("princess") for women.
This was not simply a naming convention. It was a deliberate act of social reform.
Abolishing caste — and elevating women
At the time, a person's surname instantly revealed their caste, and with it their supposed place in a rigid social hierarchy. By giving every Sikh the same two names, Guru Gobind Singh erased those markers in a single stroke. A Singh or a Kaur could not be ranked above or below another by birth. Everyone stood equal.
For women, the change was especially radical for its era. A woman's name had always been tied to her father, and then to her husband — she was defined by the men around her. Kaur gave a woman an identity entirely her own. She no longer had to take a husband's family name or be folded into his lineage. Her name announced that she was a sovereign individual, complete in herself.
To carry the name Kaur is to carry a statement: I am equal, I am whole, and I belong to no one but myself.
How Kaur is used today
You'll see Kaur used in a few ways. Some women use it as their surname; others keep it as a middle name alongside a family name. Both are completely correct. And because the name signals an identity independent of marriage, many Sikh women keep Kaur throughout their lives — including after their wedding — rather than adopting a spouse's surname. As with any tradition, personal choices vary, and every couple decides what feels right for them.
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What this means for your ceremony
Understanding the weight a name carries is part of what makes a ceremony feel truly personal. As your celebrant, I take care to get every name right — the way you say it, the way you spell it, and the way it appears on your legal paperwork. In Australia, the names on your Notice of Intended Marriage and marriage certificate need to match your identity documents exactly, so it's worth knowing early whether Kaur sits as a middle name or a surname for you.
More than the paperwork, though, it's about honour. When I weave the meaning of a name like Kaur into the words of a ceremony — spoken with the right understanding and the right respect — families notice. It tells them their culture is seen, not just accommodated.
Frequently asked questions
What does Kaur mean?
Kaur means "princess," with a deeper sense of sovereignty and dignity. It was given to every Sikh woman to affirm her own independent, equal standing.
Who started the tradition of Sikh women using Kaur?
Guru Gobind Singh Ji, the tenth Sikh Guru, introduced Singh for men and Kaur for women in 1699 at the founding of the Khalsa on Vaisakhi.
Do Sikh women change their surname after marriage?
Traditionally no — a Sikh woman keeps Kaur throughout her life, because the name signals an identity independent of father or husband. Personal choices vary today.
Is Kaur a first name, middle name, or surname?
It varies. Some women use Kaur as a surname, others as a middle name alongside a family name. Both are common and correct.
How do you pronounce Kaur?
It's most often pronounced like "kor" — close to the English word "core."
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